Henry, Italian Intended Parent in Ferrara, Italy

Explain your reasons for wanting a surrogate/donor:

When feeling ready to grow a family, we had no other option to consider than Surrogacy, as Italy does not allow for adoption from singles or same-sex couples. Although Surrogacy is not permitted in our Country, we are quite familiar with the options given in several countries around the world, for being in contact with many couples of daddies with children.They have shared their journeys with us, allowing us to choose the best option for our specific case: we have chosen a Country where Surrogacy is regulated by clear and consolidated laws, open to gay couples, where Surrogates can tell their story and share it with their communities and keep a contact with the babies born from them and with their families, where self-determination of women is granted. We know there are no "instruction manuals" and that each Journey is different: on a general scale, we are aware of the various players involved and are willing to establish a positive and empatic relation with Donor and Surrogate so that the babies have a beautiful story to tell about their origin.

How would you best describe yourself(s):

We are 39 and met in Ferrara 14 years ago during a meeting of a local LGBT association, where Henry was a volunteer. A short time later, talking together, it turned out that Alessandro sang as tenor so I asked him if he wanted to play something together as a duo piano-voice. So we started dating and try a few pieces of classical music , as well as going to the theater together around Italy in search of interesting concerts and opera performances...We have definitely never been “night animals” or disco-fans.When possible, we like to travel to visit cities, attend some special show in theatres and see how things are running in other places. In May *** we got together and in Fall *** we decided to live together, buying a small apartment in the city center of Ferrara with the help of our parents. In *** we felt we needed more space (and less neighbors on our heads) so we took a loan and bought a portion of an independent house, closer to the old city walls, which we completely re-structured according to our needs.As a result, we still have "vacant" rooms on the second floor which we hope to dedicate very soon to our kids. We live a very quiet life: our jobs absorb most of our time so, when at home, we like to relax, watch films and documentaries, listen or play music, cook nice things.We like to invite people for dinner or lunch and often "test" Henry's experiments in vegan cuisine for our friends. Henry seen by Alessandro Henry is a very profound and thoughtful person: he has a great interest especially in philosophy, sociology, anthropology and human sciences so you can be sure his opinion and actions are always sitting on solid cultural background and pondered decisions; the other side of the medal is that he sometimes has some troubles in taking fast decisions or going a little bit more easy on certain things, like spending two hours watching a stupid comic film or doing something just for simple fun.His brain is rarely looking for life-saving stand-by modes, but when this happens he is the funniest person ever, with a lovely sense of humor and a contagious smile.His biggest dislikes: seeing blood, flying, cleaning the house, horror films, people being ironic about Bach, Beethoven or Bruckner, himself losing his hair.He is also very generous, sweet, patient, caring and dedicated, and will always do the extra-mile for others. Alessandro seen by Henry Ale has great organizational and planning skills.He has a virtually absolute sense of time: if he says he will be in a place in 3 hour and 27 minutes, so it will be! The rational part of his personality tends to be predominant and, for those not familiar with him, to hide his sweet and sensitive side that he, perhaps for self-protection, tends to outshine in public.In fact, besides the skills of planner, he has a strong artistic sensibility, especially for music, having been a tenor singer.Sometimes he tends to take too sudden decisions, which may seem not pondered enough, at least to someone like me...He manages to do everything before me, from dressing up to going to bed.He is completely dedicated to the family, but let’s say that cooking is definitely not his job.He does not like crowds and all other car-drivers: both seem to have been created to interfere with his daily plans! He hates documentaries on ancient history, unnecessary noises, dust and be sitting close to people with colds on airplanes.

Use this space to communicate a letter to potential Surrogates/Donors:

We would like to have two children, in successive times, but we are open to whatever surprise future and luck will bring to our family. Our parents and siblings already know from a while that we have taken this decision and were immediately enthusiastic about us having children.We know we will get their full support and care whenever needed. During pregnancy we don't want to be oppressive, but we would like to keep regular contacts (ex: once per week ?) even in case everything is running smooth (a simple email can do the job in case "no news, good news"), plus all additional info coming out of planned examinations. This can be simply done on FB or WA to share not only the progresses of the journey but also our daily life.We hope to have the chance to meet us in person multiple times during the pregnancy to be as supportive and involved as possible. We would like to provide to the Surrogate some "evocative material" like music, recorded voices, readings, videos...) that can represent our identity, in order to create a bond with the child from conception. We are associated and volunteers in the italian association of homosexual parents (Famiglie Arcobaleno) so we learned many experiences from other same-sex couples: we are convinced that the best option for children is always to be told the truth about their origins from the very beginning, in accordance with their progressive capability to understand such a rich and articulated issue, to let them understand that their birth was the result of a mixture of generous gifts and much efforts and care by all sides. We will encourage and facilitate a future relation between the children and the Surrogate, given the kind of consciousness we intend to grow into them about their birth. That’s why we would like to get in contact with a Surrogate willing to establish a relation lasting over the years: we would like to stay in contact, plan visits with the kids from time to time and build a sort of "extended family oversea".